Many men like to give the impression that they have everything under control.
But, let’s face it; everyone has something they are afraid of.
Whether you’re afraid of heights, public speaking, social gatherings, or going to the doctor, fear is a real emotion.
Fear can be debilitating and prevent you from living life to its fullest, both personally and professionally.
Fortunately, you can take steps to cope with and overcome situations that make you afraid.
The following five proven tips will help you defeat fear and give you a new lease on life.
Make a List
Fear is a natural, adaptive, and healthy response to perceived risk, but it can also cause irrational feelings.
Fear makes some people feel incompetent, under-qualified, or even an imposter.
At its worst, fear can cause paralysis.
To overcome feelings of inadequacy, create a list of your past accomplishments and qualifications.
The physical act of writing down your positive attributes will help to nullify your fear and give you the confidence you need to overcome it.
Your list can be one item or 100 items. The number doesn’t matter.
What does matter is showing yourself that you are worthy, talented, and powerful.
Assess Pros and Cons
Paralyzing fear often results from the human brain’s tendency to focus more on possible undesirable outcomes, and less on the possible favorable ones.
Therefore, it can be helpful to deliberately call to mind the potential benefits of your feared action or situation.
This exercise can be as simple as creating a list of pros and cons, so that your brain has a concrete, visual reference point for the balancing of the scales, and settle down a bit.
Assessing the pros and cons will help you to think rationally without allowing fear to cloud your judgment.
Create A Support System
It can’t hurt to have cheerleaders in your life—positive people who can encourage you to face fear and push through it.
Having people with whom you can discuss your concerns will allow you to get a different perspective on your problem.
Knowing that those people will still be there even if things don’t go your way can provide the boost of confidence you need to get out and explore new territory and increase your likelihood of success.
If you don’t have people like this in your life right now, it’s worth the effort to find some.
Build Up a Tolerance
Gradually exposing yourself to the thing or situation you’re afraid of can help you extinguish your fear a little at a time.
Start with just imagining the feared situation and all possible outcomes.
Imagine how you would react to different scenarios and let them play out in your mind until you start to build up a “fear tolerance.”
Next, work your way up to actually engaging in the activity. Even then, start small.
If public speaking frightens you, start by practicing raising your hand and asking a question when someone else is speaking.
Envision Success
Either by itself or in connection with the previous exercise, visualizing yourself successfully engaging in your feared activity or situation can work wonders.
Pro athletes use visualization all the time: imagining shooting perfect free throws has a measurable effect on basketball players’ success on the court.
Practice imagining, as vividly as you can, yourself not just in the situation, but mastering it.
Then give it another shot in real life and see if your relationship with it has shifted.
Fearful situations won’t just disappear from your life overnight.
Coping with fear is a process.
Continue to take small steps and build on each bit of improvement.
Some fears may never completely go away, but there’s no reason why you need to be incapacitated by them.
Tweet us @mochamanstyle or leave a comment on our Facebook Page to share your thoughts on this article. Follow us on Instagram @mochamanstyle
Preston Johnson is a freelance writer who specializes in relationships, culture, and personal development. He writes regularly for major magazines, websites, and journals about relationships, culture, and self-improvement. After graduating from Morehouse College with a degree in Psychology, Preston worked for a few years as an editor at a small publishing house before deciding to branch out on his own as an independent writer and journalist. Preston lives in Atlanta and enjoys music festivals, poetry readings, and fine dining.